Ruminations on Weight Watchers

I joined Weight Watchers a while ago, and after losing a bit of weight eventually fell off the wagon and quit the program.  I managed though to keep most of the weight off that I wanted to.  When I began, I weighed a rather unflattering 188.  At one point I was down to 169.  Right now I'm at 175.  There aren't very many men who are in the program.  I'm guessing about 5% of any group will be men.  I have one acquaintance who continues to use the membership solely to meet women.  As he says (in an admittedly vulgar manner) "Fat chicks need love too."  I went back this weekend just to see if I can push through and get my weight down to 169-165. 

A couple of years ago, I really liked the program as it was relatively simple.  And I liked some of the improvements, you can now eat all the fruit you want.  That fruit was restricted in the past always seemed kind of dumb to me.  No one waddles into Weight Watchers because they eat too much fruit.  In tinkering with the program unfortunately you are hopelessly dependent on looking up points as opposed to estimating them. The program also obviously catered to people with sendentary lifestyles.  What they considered intense exercise I would consider light to moderate. 

Fortunately most of the people in the Saturday group that I used to detest were not there.  These archetypes include:  "fat chick married to Quasimodo", "woman who lies about exercising", and most annoying of all "woman who won't shut up".  The meeting itself was kind of apt, because it had quite a few people in there like myself, who had some success with it, and then fell off the wagon. 

Mother's Day Weekend

This weekend was Mother's Day.  And I celebrated by going golfing with my parents.  I actually went on both Saturday and Sunday.  On Saturday, I went with my parents, and brought along a friend from grade school who was in town from Madison (Debbie).  Saturday I was sort of squeamish because it was forecasted to have rain and or thunderstorms the entire day.  But for pretty much the entire time we were there, the weather was decent, if a hair chilly.  I had gushed about Debbie's ability to drive the golf ball to my parents, and they were suitably impressed.  My own game was pretty mediocre...but that was all that could be expected since April has been exceptionally cold and dreary, and I pretty much didn't play at all.  Debbie and I however, both got birdies on the same hole.  As fate would have it, I would get a birdie on the same hole the very next day. 

In addition to golf, I also made dinner for my parents.  I pulled out the stops and made a pretty good dinner.  I made a beef bourginon over barley.  For dessert, I made an apple tart and a vanilla ice cream to go with it.  I actually made the ice cream, which was a nice touch...but real vanilla beans are pretty expensive.  When you finally extract the seeds from a vanilla bean, its about $3.50 for a bunch of seeds that can be rolled into a ball the size of a smallish booger.  If I'm going to continue using them I'll need to buy them from Costco. 

Life Without Television

For almost two years now, I have lived without a TV hooked up to an antennae or cable hookup.  And the truth be told, I don't miss it.  I still watch DVDs and may casually watching a sporting event at the local drinking repository (i.e., bar), but I have no plans to change this habit anytime soon.  I did a little research online for people like me who are without TV and they usually fall into two camps 1) radical religious fundamentalists and 2) countercultural artistic types.  I am not really the poster child for either umbrella.  Something eyeopening to consider:  more households in the US have TVs than indoor plumbing.  

Why did I go without you ask?  The principle reason is that I had bought a condo in 2009, and in the stressful rush to get everything done in time, I neglected to order cable service.  I had said to myself "Well, I'm up to my neck in stuff to do around the new place, I'll get around to it eventually."   But about 3 weeks later, I realized televisions stranglehold was free.  I no longer cared who was eliminated from the popular reality TV show.  Favorite TV shows became inconsequential.  And I had oodles of free time.

A secondary reason, is that my dad loved TV a little too much, and it drove me nuts.  He honestly thought that the bunch of us sitting around watching TV was quality time.  The TV would be on immediately when he came home, and he would sit on his lazy fat ass up until the Jay Leno monologue around 10:45.  He also had a couple VCRs going so as not to miss a single nanosecond of his favorite shows.  In the 90s for a while, he used to highlight his favorite shows in the TV guide, so as not to miss any.  That stopped immediately after John Walsh on "America's Most Wanted" profiled a guy who did the exact same thing.  And Walsh said something to the effect of:  "I hope we get this dirtbag off the streets, so he can highlight his TV guide in prison."  Which reduced my mom and I into fits on uncontrollable laughter.  In fairness he has since changed, for reasons I'll share at another time.  

There are though, a couple downsides for life without TV, the first is that I have to monitor the weather a bit more carefully, lest I wear a white tee shirt when its expected to rain.  Also, I have fallen hopelessly behind when it comes to popular culture.  I rarely know what movies are out, I don't know a lot of the details of what actors and actresses are doing, and I have to fake it around the watercooler when people ask me about the great game that was on TV. 

Another unexpected consequence, is that my TV, which was of an ok size 7 years ago when I bought it, is now laughably small and "unflat".  I had a dinner party last month, and a recurring comment was "Wow, you're TV is so small."  Rest assured it is inversely proportional to my magnificent dong. 

Confessions of A Club Ho

I love golf clubs...all things about them. I love trying out new clubs. I study the lofts of the newest clubs and compare them with what is already out there. I read about new club heads, new shafts and new grips. I dream of the day that I can use the stiffest shafts like Tiger, Vijay and Phil.

This love of clubs means I can do things no ordinary human can do. I can identify the brand, model of a golf club from 100 yards away. In one particular case I even identified the year the club was originally issued. For the record, it was last year's TaylorMade Burner fairway wood.

But before you write me to tell me how you envy my superpowers, let me assure you that it is also a terrible burden. Because I am never ever satisfied with the 14 clubs in my bag. I am constantly "ho-ing" out my clubs at the golf store looking for the perfect combination of clubs that will turn me pro. It is a never ending and ultimately fruitless quest; one I intellectually know is folly. Yet I'm considering buying new clubs even as I type this.

I once actually got giddy with excitement because the local golf club had expensive Japanese forged wedges for sale.  

Before you decry me as a degenerate, hopelessly beyond help, let me assure you that the rabbit hole is even deeper than you might imagine. Because while I limit my club ho-ing to off the rack items, there are others who aren't content with such pedestrian pursuits.

There is a sub group of people who desire only tour issued equipment. Believe it or not, Tiger Woods doesn't go to the Sports Authority and buy clubs off the rack. Tour issued equipment is built to the specs of the particular golfer. The weight, feel, lofts, bounce, and shaft might all be different. Supposedly Ian Poulter's clubs had $30,000.00 in special grinding. But its not enough to buy these hand me downs...because there is something more. Tour players get to play prototypes; clubs that joe sixpack may never ever get to play. Or, worese yet, might have to wait months to play--if ever. Good examples of this are Callaway's x-forged iron prototypes, and the TaylorMade Spider putter. There was a frenzy of buzz amongst club ho's as to when these might be available if ever. For the record, the Spider Putter is a good one, but I've still three putted (ugh). I'm frankly not good enough for the x-forged prototypes, and if I was to spend $140 or so per club, I might as well get properly fitted instead of buying them off the shelf.

There is even another sub group of people who specialize in Japanese equipment. The Japanese market is often way ahead of the rest of the world. This is due to their demand of newest cutting edge technology, and a willingness to pay high premiums for exclusive products. For as expensive as golf is here in the US, it is almost prohibitively expensive in Japan; this is a bit of a generalization, but from what I saw, most golf equipment cost almost five times as much. An example of the cutting edge technology the Japanese golf consumer demands: square headed drivers were available to the Japanese market five years before they were available in the United States. As mentioned Japanese clubs are also extremely exclusive and unavailable here. Items that are high coveted include the square headed TaylorMade Driver, Mizuno's red five sided driver.  Check them out here:  http://www.tourspecgolf.com/Japan-Market-Only-Clubs

Perhaps the only saving grace is that I buy lessons from my golf coach. Many who ho their clubs fail to do what is probably the surest and fastest way to improve your game, and invest in lessons. So in my mind, that is progress :)

And So It Begins...

Hopefully, this will not be one of "those" blogs that we've all been subjected to.  Where the person begins with passion and enthusiasm, and the blog dies a slow and painful death one or two journal entries later.  I am a bit of a polymath, and will be writing about things other than the sport that both simultaneously gives me multiple orgasms and makes me gnash my teeth in anger (sometimes within minutes).  Basically, you will have the opportunity to "look over my shoulder" as I write about my day to day life, my interests, my sexual exploits (if applicable) and (in theory) my evolution as a human being.  Something I really hope to convey, is that you will see and hear my authentic voice.  I have a friend who has an established blog on here, and I know its filled with delusion and him "mis-remembering" the past.  He gets all pissy when I start to critically fact-check the stories/rants he goes on in his blog.  Rest assured, I won't subject you to that. I hope to post things daily, even if its a link to something I find amusing and or interesting. 

Those who have seen my posts on Facebook probably know the general overall tone and content that I'll be writing about. Except I'll no longer be hampered by competing with Mafia Wars posts in the news feed, and can write a little more in-depth.  

I want this to also be dynamic and interactive, and not about you stalking me.  So comments are welcome.  :)